Tall Angry Monster

Bad April Fool's Day

04/01/2008 9:57 PM

So I'm trying to get through the Rock Band's solo drum campaign on hard, and I'm stuck on "(Don't Fear) The Reaper." I'm pretty stubborn and I'm refusing to practice songs so I just keep starting from the beginning. The annoying part is that I'm have problems with is the last 10% or so. This song is one of the longer ones so I get about 30 seconds of practice every six minutes. I don't like getting booed off the stage, it's not very good for the self esteem. My last run I'm feeling "this is the run", but as I'm going through the hard part the magic of April Fool's day says "Gotcha" while my bass pedal says "SNAP!" as the motherfucker broke in two.

I'd be super pissed, but Rock Band's warranty seems to be everlasting, so they will just send you another piece each time one breaks. I looked into reinforcing the bass pedal, but fuck that it costs $20, at the minimum. I'm going to beat my pedal into submission, and each time it breaks I'm going to send for a new one. This may teach EA to make a pedal that can take a beating, like it's supposed to.

Speaking of breaking things, I've mastered a special technique that can be used against iPod owners that think they are the catís pajamas (yeah itís from the 20s, yeah, Iím bringing it back). An MP3 player isn't magical, it doesn't make you popular, it plays fucking music. The problem with commercials, besides that they shouldn't exist, is that it can convince people of anything, even electing Mike as mega ultra global dictator general of the universe.

After the whole St. Patrick's day debacle, I decided I needed some research. It turns out, with the right spin, you can even make the bible interesting.

That is 2 Ls